hand holding a black lace balloon

Disclaimer: I do NOT know Kate Spade. This is not a secret tell-all for gossip. These are late-night thoughts reflecting on her recent death. This is written with the most respect for her life, legacy, friends, family, colleagues, and admires.

Also disclaimer: mention of suicide. Please protect yourself and guard your heart and mind. 

Tuesday the world learned of Kate Spade’s passing by suicide.

I’m not going to use “commit,” because suicide is a component of mental illness that people die from. Do not debate with me on this.

Kate Spade’s brand influenced thousands of people. For the bright, sophisticated, chic women who loved a bright world, Kate was your brand.

Kate Spade graphic

Courtesy of Sona Martirosian

And yet we didn’t know that while she created a world of bright colors and flowers, she was struggling the opposite.

This, unfortunately, isn’t new.

Robin Williams was one of the funniest people alive until his untimely death by suicide which later revealed his struggle with depression.

A photo of Linkin Park’s Chester Bennington was posted on Instagram a few days before he died by suicide as well.

What we see on the outside isn’t what’s going on the inside. The grass we think is greener is really just spray paint covering the dirt. 

Kate Spade allegedly left a note for her 13-year old daughter and her husband. I can’t imagine what’s in it and I honestly don’t think we need to know. But there’s this unsettling feeling about what happiness means. 

If it’s not building a brand from the ground up, becoming one of the most successful entrepreneurs in the world, or being one of the most beloved actors, or being a musician who used his unique and powerful voice and spoke for others, what is the real pinnacle of happiness?

I’m not saying you can’t be happy, or there is no point in trying. There definitely is a reason to get up every morning, even when you don’t feel like it. 

But I wonder, what does that look like? How do I help others find that? So many questions I don’t have answers to.

In the end, I need you to do a favor for me:

Take care of yourself. That includes but not limited to unplugging from the news. It seems like something is happening every minute, that we’re in a whirlwind of chaos that’s only getting stronger. Turn off everything and find a tiny thing that brings you joy (sleep counts).

Talk to someone, anyone. You’re not a bother. Your feelings are valid. Reach out (my inbox is open) or give a call.

Take a break. Work hard but also recover. To be your best you need to rest.

I’m writing this less than 24 hours since hearing about Kate Spade’s death. I’m still in shock because I never thought—A LOT of us never thought, and yet there’s an untold story about a struggle we didn’t know existed.

Rest In Peace Kate Spade, and thank you.